A good first for a relaxed exam
This shift of mindset towards finals has been interesting. Observing my confused inner mechanisms trying to figure out what was going on. But the hard work I’ve put in to shift my perspective has paid off. For the amount of practice exercises I did, I think I did pretty well.
I did notice I did some a dumb mistake, calculating the numbers of seconds in an hour by only multiplying by 60. It’s 3600s in an hour Judith. Jeez! The rest of my calculations was good at least. The biggest victory is that I didn’t pratictice a type of calculations, and from the wise advice of my favourite study budy, the calm and quiet Al, I looked for clues, and used logic. When I verified in the class notes for the solut, I was spot on. As Al says, there’s patterns, and clues in everything a teacher gives.
I was a little upset that I couldn’t figure out the answer to the very last question as my calculations gave something impossible. When I messaged Al, he confirmed that it was thw right result and it simply meant 100% of the molecules reacted. Ha! What do you know? If I would have trusted my msth I would have answered just that.
All, and all, I very satisfied with my performance. This is the brand new begging of a whole new way to study and move forward in life. A way fre from the toxic grip of perfectionism. Letting go of this seemingly necessary, but incredibly damaging cognitive distortion is difficult. When functioning under conditional self-worth, accepting to make mistakes, and letting go of the need to control every steps takes a lot. Cultivating self-worth despite imperfect results is beand new.
My initial reaction was negative. A part of me felt guilty that I didn’t more effort in studying. In a few ways I did waste time over socializing at the begging of the week. I had to catch my inner critique attempting to bully me a lot through out the afternoon. After confirming that I didn’t do so bad with Al, it calm me down.
I’m developing a brand new way of interacting with myself; it’s weird, and unsettling which is a good sign. Also, I created a new mantra to stop my desire to over study: “I won’t let teachers kill me with stress.” Stress is the number one killer of any life form. No teachers, no schools, no employer, and no lover is important enough to kill me. Most of all, my inner critique has no right to stress me any; I’m put an end to this bully’s killing spree.
