Advantageous handicap
I’m so getting my handicapped certificate! After another great session with my tutor at lunch, she once more transformed my existence, providing me with life-saving information. I will be able to realize my dream of going to university and make studying my livelihood! I always said that if money was not a concern, I would travel and study endlessly; well, half of that is a reality now.
How? Under new regulation in the province I'm moving in, if you are diagnosed with a learning handicap, such as dyslexia, dysorthographia, ADHD and other conditions along those lines, you are eligible to have your entire living expenses covered while being in school! I suffer from dyslexia for sure and most likely dysorthographia. The first thing I’ll be doing when I move to my new place is to get my diagnosis so I won’t ever have to worry again about paying for rent and food while studying.
I dropped out of art school because of a lack of funds; I feared going to university my entire life because studying takes so much out of me that working simultaneously is usually not possible. I felt dumb and inadequate my whole life for things that fundamentally are not my fault. What has held me back and caused me so much sorrow will now be my ticket for the life of my dreams. How ironic? How liberating!
I’ve been having bursts of joyous tears all day; I will finally find peace. I’ll finally be able to be myself and proud of it. I’ll finally have a life I love. That means everything to me. Fear will never be controlling the rest of my existence ever again. I won't ever stay up at night fighting poverty. I’ll never have to endure a shitty job and allow clients to treat me poorly to make ends meet. I’ll be able to study for as long, as far, as many subjects as my heart desires and for the rest of my days.
I finally have a safe place to be and grow without fear. I have a home; its name is school.
