Endings and new beginnings
In three weeks, I will be at the end of my first semester and in the process of packing before my move. I’ve announced my life changes to my entire social network; as some eagerly await my return, others will miss my company. Processing the feelings from my goodbyes is what I feel most tonight. It’s a big life change.
From my career to my social circle and my day-to-day habits, everything is taking a new shape, and I cannot tell how it will affect me in the long run. I’m optimistic that the changes will be for the best though mourning my past life may take a while. I’m leaving my nomadic lifestyle for many years to come, if not forever; I’m letting go of a business I took ten years to build; a city I felt at home in will now be a distant memory… My focus was on my new achievements for the past three months, and excitement drove my actions. Now, I am confronted to live another grieving period just when I'm still completing the one from my breakup in February.
My heart hasn’t fully recovered from my love loss and now the loss of what used to be my existence for a decade is about to evaporate in less than a month. It’s a lot, but I don’t regret for an instant my choice. New opportunities have already emerged as my East Canada friends have already planned many activities and care for me. Also, their reopening has started sooner, which will make for a more agreeable life when I arrive. As much as the joyful upcoming events will energize me, I can’t skip or ignore the morning I will have to process.
Hopefully, between June and September, I will have some quiet time for myself. Also, as I set up my new place, I’ll be able to finish process my emotion to give way to the new. Right now, patience, kindness and compassion will be my motto to welcome the sadness attached to such a massive transition—one baby step at a time.
