I came to school to use the wifi for my online counseling and later on finishing that lab report that keeps giving me all kinds of questions and doubts. I ended up later in the evening with a fun and studious group of students. This spontaneous gathering really uplifted me even if I was the third wheel. (I was the only white person there, and also, I’m the oldest of our class.)
Still, their encouragements and the way they briefly picked at each other between exercises lightened my spirit. To listen to the way they explained things to one another, and how some struggled brought me reassurance. Even if I know they take comfort in my hardship too since I’m the slowest of the class, still, I don’t mind to be the “not golden to make their golden shine" as Glennon Doyle would say. I’m helping in my very own way even if it’s not flattering.
One thing for sure, I’m glad I was late on finishing the report, new instructions came in from the teacher, and we would have been in trouble if I didn’t make the essential corrections I made this evening. All is set, and I sent the document for my partner to review and submit to the teacher. I’m glad I could help her even if I was a scattered pain in the butt at times.
I remember in art school taking an excruciatingly long time to make a head sculpture. The teacher indicated it would be modified on the second stage of the project, but I had invested so much time in the first stage and it was so beautiful that I couldn’t change it. In less than 3 times the hours I took for the first one, I achieved a similar result and brought the modifications needed for the second part. In French, we have an expression that goes like: “tumbling on the carpet’s flowers". Pretty much making an issue of something flat and harmless. It’s seems that I find my rythme at achieving new skills by tumbling on each printed flowers I can find before I finally figure my way, and get better at it. I cross my fingers I’ve fallen from enough flower patterns to start moving forward in my studies.