Pushing through the discomfort.
By now, I’ve gotten familiar with my procrastination patterns. The most obvious is when I feel so overwhelmed by my study load that every little details of my studies get blown out of proportion. I’ve been trying to overcome my fear of the hard concepts I’m learning, but rationalizing ain’t the right approach.
Leveraging my many tutors so that they can lead me step-by-step through my exercises has been much more productive than trying to supress my anxiety. The simple fact I can immediately turn to someone when I’m stuck, and get spontaneous feedback on my mistakes brings a reassurance that my inner-self desperately need. It may be more demanding, and a little more costly, but if it can set me back on track, and help me puch through the fear, I will continue with this strategy.
I will make it in time when it comes to my quizzes, and homeworks for the weekend even if St is visiting, and I will be in Lalaland for two days and a half. I’m so eager to see him, a little nervous, and very curious to see how our physical intimacy will unfold. We’ve talked about our concerns, our hopes, and what we wish to experience in the up coming days. We’ve been panting at time, and pacing at others. A beautiful mix of emotions is flowing in us. There is a constant at the heart of all this; we know we want to be together. We will figure our way as we go. One thing is certain, we aren’t short in dreams of futures coexistence.
Time to rest before a mega tutoring day.