Rainy Monday

We all love the Fall when the sun is bright, the air is crisp and the leaves are red. That’s the fun part in the beginning. Now, we’re starting the later half of the season, rain, cold, wind, and greyish browns everywhere. I’m a little bit blue. It’s mesmerising how St’s moods are synchronised with mine. He’s stressed with work, and I’m stressed with juggling all the flying pieces of my life, and the weather is depressing.

Home projects, health insurance changes with my current university, the application process for my new university, studies, tweeking the lose ends of my recent move, and an upcoming trip have increased my stress levels. Same thing for my beloved, his work has a bunch of orders being pushed left, and right while he’s trying to get everything done for our trip. We both will pass through this stressful time, but Mondays are often discouraging. At the base of the mountain, the climb looks so big. We’ll get there, one small step at a time.

We finished our tv show binge yesterday, and nothing else is on the list to watch. Finally! Tonight was a screen free night. It felt good. I was looking forward to a quiet home where our conversations, and inner thoughts could be heard. Hopefully this time turned inwards, and towards each other will lead to new ways to entertain our evenings.

I managed to put in a bit of studying even if my wind kept drifting off in all kinds of directions today. It was a low focus Monday; often is when I feel overwhelmed. I’m pushing through a more difficult chapter in physics, and it’s worrisome. My current tutor is great for maths, but he’s less versed in physics theory. I have to rely on myself to understand it all. I’m doing okay, but it’s scary.

In the end, all will be fine. I must accept my fears, and keep moving forward.

Gratitude journal:

I’m grateful for quiet nights.



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Judith's Squirrels

Daily diary of a student entering university at forty. Just writing for me. Kaizenka, ex-nomade, foodie, and health nerd.