Finally, I can breathe. My schedule has room now for enjoying my own readings and spend more time taking care of my health. My stress has shifted from negative to positive, and I see definite progress. It’s so comforting to see I can manage my energy levels adequately and that chronic fatigue has subsided. I’m fully in charge of my own destiny for the first time in almost ten years, without influences from romantic partners or following the expectations of those I care about—what a freeing experience.
I received great news by mail in the form of financial aid, and the many steps towards my new school are unfolding steadily. To be at the center of my realization and fully present to what I’m accomplishing feels wonderful.
In the past, I simply couldn’t see my successes; my mental health didn’t permit. To only take account of my failures and errors was creeping, though I knew nothing else. I thought that if I was mean enough to myself, I would eventually change. To break this cycle took decades of personal growth and therapy. I can proudly claim for the first time in my life that I have reprogrammed my inner narrative; I know my neuropathways are different. I learn faster, stay calmer under high stress, and talk myself out of strong emotions.
I can’t express how good a healthy psyche feels. All those years of assisted introspection and education are paying off big time. Now, I can look at a future led and created by the soul power of my will. Without escaping in denial and idealization or taking refuge in pessimism, I can balance my goals. This place of calm assurance and kind motivation is brilliant.